|Posted by Lorelie Autor on March 7, 2011 at 3:34 AM|
March 6, 2011 (Notes from my Journal)
I just attended the Contemplative Prayer training given by Sis Nina and Bro Rouquel last Saturday, March 5, 2011 at St. Theresa. I am so grateful for Sis Nina and Bro. Rouquel for bringing the Holy Spirit in the training. I just want to share to everyone the experience I had during the workshop/exercise in the training. Sis Nina told us that in understanding a story in the bible, we need to close our eyes and imagine that we are in the story so that we will know the Lord's words for us through that story. So we all closed our eyes and she read Matthew 8 19-27...
When Jesus saw a crowd around him, he gave orders to cross to the other side. There were many boats.
A scribe approached and said to him, "Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go."
Jesus answered him, "Foxes have dens and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to rest his head."
He got into a boat and his disciples followed him.
Suddenly a violent storm came up on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by waves; but he was asleep.
They came and woke him, saying, "Lord, save us! We are perishing!"
He said to them, "Why are you terrified, O you of little faith?" Then he got up, rebuked the winds and the sea. “Be Still”, he said and there was great calm.
The men were amazed and said, "What sort of man is this, whom even the winds and the sea obey?"
Sis Nina read this story twice, the first time she read the story, I imagined Jesus asking everyone to go in the boats and cross the river. There were several boats and I was in another boat. I just watched the disciples’ boat from afar. When the storm came, I didn’t know what was going on in their boat, but I was just watching them. Its amazing though that I was not afraid of the storm or maybe the storm did not really affected our boat, I couldn’t tell.
Then when the story was read again, I made sure that I went to the boat where Jesus was. So when Jesus asked everyone to go and cross the river, I made sure that I went into His boat. When I was in the boat, I saw Jesus went to sleep so I went to sleep beside Him. When the storm was happening, everybody was afraid but since I was asleep, I felt I was being rocked to sleep, I felt at peace. Then the disciples woke Jesus up, they said, "Are you not afraid that we are all going to die". Jesus woke up and I woke up. I was waiting for Jesus to speak “Be Still” because I know that He spoke in the story, however Jesus did not speak. I saw the waves coming to us, Jesus looked at the waves and the waves went away and it was calm. Then Jesus turn to me and said, “ Remember this peace when you are alone in the world.” Then I spoke to Him and said, “ but Lord, I was sleeping with you, I don’t know how I would have reacted if I was awake.” But he did not answer me instead he repeated His words, “ Remember this peace when you are alone in the world” he added two more lines, “Do not be afraid of the world. I have already conquered the world.” Then everything disappeared, the boats, the disciples, Jesus and I was alone. Then I opened my eyes and I was back in the world.
What an amazing experience…I was in awe that I was involved in the story and I was in awe that Jesus spoke to me. He did not even speak to the waves but the waves followed His thoughts. He did not even speak to the disciples but they all stared in awe of what just happened. However, he spoke to me and I am overwhelmed with joy and happiness. I could not even describe the amount of joy in my heart. I am humbled by the experience. I guess the Lord reminded me that If I choose to just sleep with Him in the midst of the chaos in life. I would not be afraid of any storm because I know that I am beside Him and I can be peaceful with Him. In fact, I can see the storm differently, "the storm can rock me to sleep with Jesus", meaning any storm in my life can allow me to cling to God even more. I remember the passage that says, "In our weakness, the power of God is made perfect." I believe that in my weakness, in every storm, I can allow God's power to manifest even more in my life. Thank you for the experience Lord. I love you!